the subconscious

Tonight is just like any other night. But for some reason I can't drift to sleep. I've been watching back to back episodes of fresh prince on nick at night, and now roseanne is on. I'm not sure why it's 5am and I'm wide awake. Okay so I have a yawn here and there but nothing major.

So ever so often my mind wanders to memories of my ex and I, and I feel as if I'm slightly almost 100% over dude. Now years back (2 to be exact) I posted something on him; and ever so often I reminisce on what we had. Although it's long gone, I guess it's still in the back of my head. Just taunting me.
-when love is/was as strong as ours, it'll/its gonna take a while to get over it.


I've been jamming hard to my ipod, hoping that something would get me to drift to sleep but as minutes roll on I just realize the mass amounts of crap that I need to focus on. Here's a quick rundown..

•Take two rolls of film
•Develop three rolls
•Do 48 pages of the yearbook for my may 4th deadline
•do a stop animation video
•finish two triptics (6 paintings in total)
•and take pictures at events for yearbook
•organize meetings for other crap...

Yeah I've officially put wayy to many things on my plate. But I like being busy, having to much time on my hands makes me believe that I'm not fulfilling my master plan to take over the world.

I'll keep you posted.

P.S I saw on a blog that this girl gets severe panic attacks and asked for advice. --i wish I knew how to control mine, but I just take breathers and go through each memory that replays in my mind and think of things that calm you down.

...You might think we're crazy but panic attacks and anxiety isn't funny at all